He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
