why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
