pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Randomize
