oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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