I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
