i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
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