Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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