Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
