I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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