Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
