Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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