I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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