Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
i can't believe i had my finger in that
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize