So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Randomize
