She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
