So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
