can we get nightvision for the apartment?
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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