She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
