Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
