pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Randomize
