how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize