Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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