i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
