Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Randomize
