Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize