well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
