i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
