new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
