so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize