now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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