You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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