So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
