I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Randomize
