Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Randomize