it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
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