yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize