We're like a lot better than the average bears
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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