problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Randomize
