Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
