Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Sorry about my life...
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
