I've blown a few things in my day
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
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