I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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