i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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