textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
