I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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