hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
You're like the curious george of whores
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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