How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize