glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
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