DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
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