I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Randomize