Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I understand Curling. That high.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize